My quick response was most often, “No, I can’t help you find one but I can tell you where to start.”
When I was 47, newly single after a 27 year relationship, I approached the dating ‘scene’ with wariness. How in the world would I ever find another mate? What would I look for? How would I find him? And, of course, WHEN?
I asked (read: whining and crying) every friend and every spiritual teacher the same questions that I hear each week. One of the first friends I asked said, “You won’t find anyone else, you are too unique.” Other friends shared that I would “find him when you are ready.” And, finally, I was assured that he “was somewhere nearby.”
I am grateful for all responses that helped me begin my journey, some more helpful than others. All held clues that helped immeasurably.
“Be fully yourself and when you turn around he will be right there,” was both the most frustrating and most clear response of them all. This meant I had to focus on me, my life, my values, my joys, my passions, and LIVE THEM AS MY UNIQUE SELF. Oh my. And, really, really he would see me? Really. As it turns out, that was and still is the best counsel.
I set about to really be ME and I employed the tools I use with my clients with myself. I explored even more deeply all my edges, my values, my desires, and my visions.
Then, I added my own particular twist, something that was an experiment born of my curiosity and a willingness to discover something (or someone) new. I was astounded by the results. I used one simple directional tool and shared it very definitely with the Universe. My journey began quickly.
Three men showed up in my life within the first year that matched my request. Two of them were ‘random’ meetings, the other was a ‘match’ from a dating site. I am deeply grateful for all that I learned from each of them. All three had THE ONE THING in common that I had discerned while using the tools I use every day with clients. None of them were quite ‘right’. All are amazing men.
One day, after a particularly teary and loud discussion with the Universe, I went to a networking meeting where I was being my full self and turned around to see HIM. Sure, I did not know at that exact moment what our journey would be, but I smiled and he stared at me with surprise. A few minutes later, he approached me and asked me these questions:
“Are you a numerologist?” I replied, “Yes.”
“Are you a daughter of the earth?” And while a bit stunned at the oddness of the question, I could easily answer “Yes” because I am after all, on the Earth and an earth sign to boot.
“Are you a beautiful dancer of the heart?” My response was only delayed by my surprise at anyone knowing that information. “Yes” I replied with a little laugh.
“We need to talk” was his short reply as he handed me his full name and number.
Now it was my turn. In my best “keep it light, graceful and direct” way, I looked directly into his eyes and said, “How do you know so much about me?”
He stared right back and said, “I have seen your website. My name is David, may I call you tomorrow?”
At that point, all I could say was “Yes.” Everything in my being was at attention and I was feeling a surge of joy. Wow. OK.
My spiritual teacher was right…I was networking, being myself, focused on my passions and my work and HE was right there. Wow.
Now I was curious. Did he fit the request I had made of the Universe? I found out the next day when he called. Yes. He did.
So, my little experiment was still working. I was shocked with delight.
We have been together ever since. And the exploration continues both with myself and with him. To my surprise, all the tools that helped us find each other also apply to deepening this into an extraordinary relationship.
You can do this, too. I will help you.
All the steps I followed to “find my most compatible soul mate” were powerful and I will reveal the first 3 steps in Keys to Unlocking Relationship and Intimacy Breakthroughs.